"Inspiration comes of working every day." -- Charles Baudelaire
I like this quote. It keeps me near the realm of sanity. And reminds me of the graffiti I stumbled upon awhile back in the image above.
I've been working on yet another grant application - the largest to date, and one that will determine the time-line of the foreseeable future for the nonprofit I've begun. The grant is for $100,000 to pay 10 design teams to consider the future of the vacant grain elevators I've been intently focusing on in the Omaha landscape for a couple of years now. The words of Mr. Baudelaire remind me that time, routine, and perseverance are crucial. That maybe every small act of 'work' creates energy that produces both the inspiration to keep going and eventually the progress one seeks.
During this particular grant I've been increasingly entertained, at moments to the point of uncontrollable laughter, by the process involved in obtaining money from the US Government. When applying for a federal grant, there are 10,000 steps to complete in order to be legitimate. Since grants are all about crossing every 't' and dotting every 'i', there is no step in the bureaucratic bullshit that can go unaddressed.
This week, I've registered with Dun and Bradstreet for a DUN number. I've registered with the Central Contractor Registry in order to be valid with the government grant organization. And I've registered with grants.gov credential provider. All of this for a single grant application that may not even be awarded, and in addition to the recent year long process of obtaining official 501c(3) status. Amazing, really. None of these steps do I really understand the purpose. I do what the list says, because in order to persevere, I can only give energy to understanding my ultimate goal. Isn't that funny? As someone trying to create something new and unique, with a vision for something greater and independent, I submit to rules I don't understand. Is it impossible to avoid being a cog in the machine? Or do we have to be a cog in some respects in order to be a spanner in the works in others? I just don't know.
4 comments:
Thanks for posting that Baudelaire quote, and your ruminations, AT. I really needed to read it, and them.
Baudelaire is good for so many occassions. I've been reading lots of Camus lately too - not so good for inspiration...........
"During this particular grant I've been increasingly entertained, at moments to the point of uncontrollable laughter."
Just during this particular grant ... ? Aren't you almost always entertained to the point of uncontrollable laughter ... ? I'd be much more worried if you *weren't* laughing uncontrollably while working on this one.
there are always 2 options,
to laugh or to cry.
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